Quiet is becoming a rare beast. When was the last time you became aware of quiet? Where were you? What were you doing? Were you alone? If not, who was with you?
Some years ago, I had a daily practice of hiking a few miles in and a few miles out on a particular trail. Hiking in, my mind was the loudest creature on the trail. But there was always a moment I would notice—on my way back out—quiet. Just here. Dirt under feet. Sky. Red-wing blackbird call. Breeze swaying grasses. Bees in the flowering Buckeye tree.
Facing my monitors, hands on my laptop keyboard/touch pad, I am frequently swept away by the incoming tide of communications—text, images, video, audio. I have no doubt that’s why I drink tea. Filling the electric teapot with water, measuring the loose tea, pouring the hot water over the leaves, slows everything down for a few minutes.
These posts I write emerge from the quiet…often tentatively at first. At some point, I need to sit still, open my ears inward, and pay attention to something I don’t yet understand. It’s not easy. And frequently, it’s uncomfortable.
We have to work at quiet today. We have to learn how to invite it into our lives. We have to discover delightful ways to share quiet with our children and our friends. We have to demonstrate how we value and even, at times, treasure quiet for its gifts.
Here’s an invitation: Share with me your experiences and memories of quiet (or the lack of it) in your life. What scares you about quiet? What kinds of quiet inhabit your world? How do your children relate to quiet? Respond to this post and I’ll schedule a time for us to have a conversation. I really appreciate when people respond. If you haven’t responded to a previous invitation, consider responding to this one. I would love to hear from you.
Events: I’ll be giving a presentation Saturday, October 13, as part of Parenting U at the Julia Morgan School for Girls (Mills College Campus). And Tuesday, October 16, I’ll be facilitating a discussion at the Albany Library following the screening of Delaney Ruston’s film Screenagers. Join us at the library if you’re local.
The Relevant Reread: Here’s an excerpt…
What happens when I don’t create the time to reflect? Stress levels go up, worry takes the lead, will power goes out the window, and I’m looking for any old escape button to relieve the pressure (think Facebook scrolling, think media consumption, think ADHD on steroids). Can you relate? Do you think your kids appreciate the need for reflection? Where do they learn that today? When and how do they see you reflecting?
Read the post on the value of scheduling reflective time.
I am a fan: of KQED’s Above the Noise with host Myles Bess. I enjoyed this one, Is Video Game Addiction Real? It’s a good conversation catalyst, especially if you have Fortnite players in the house. Myles dives into the research on games and addiction. Hint: it is not black and white.
