Mindfulness is awareness that arises through paying attention,

on purpose,

in the present moment,

non-judgmentally.

 

—Jon Kabat-Zinn

Claudia L’Amoreaux

Mindful Digital Life

Search Results for: Sherry Turkle

Conversation is the the human way to practice unitasking

© by Claudia L’Amoreaux

Photo of mother and young son with faces touching each other

Photo by Bruno Nascimento

We’re not looking for solutions. We’re looking for first steps.

—Sherry Turkle

As usual, I’m thinking a lot about conversations—in particular, how we create the conditions for conversation to flourish in our families. I’m re-viewing Sherry Turkle’s Talk at Google about her book, Reclaiming Conversation (I’ve written about Turkle’s work frequently in the Friday Mindful Digital Life posts—catch up here if you’re new to Mindful Digital Life). [Read more…] about Conversation is the the human way to practice unitasking

Now—a perfect time to begin your family tech conversation

© by Claudia L’Amoreaux

A father and son with sign that says Make America Think Again

Photo by Jose Moreno

In her book Reclaiming Conversation, Sherry Turkle writes about the work of conversation. Think about it. We show up to talk with other people face-to-face (when we could be watching the next episode of You Name It or tunneling miles down in Instagram). We listen without judgments (or at least we try hard to suspend our usual lightning-fast judgments). We ask questions when we don’t understand and we make ourselves vulnerable. We risk sharing what we’re thinking, especially when our thoughts are still unformed and our feelings may be raw, confusing, or overwhelming. We struggle to articulate a question that plagues us. We discover what we’re passionate about or what’s worrying us as we hear ourselves thinking aloud. We sense what we’re too afraid to share. We become more skillful at offering our attention to another. We hear solutions that would never have occurred to us on our own. We discover the value of thinking with others as we arrive at a place we could only arrive at together. We learn to navigate disagreement and conflict with increasing grace and appreciation for another’s point of view. We grow more tolerant of the natural lulls and pauses in conversation, letting the silences be ok. [Read more…] about Now—a perfect time to begin your family tech conversation

Always on, always on you

© by Claudia L’Amoreaux

We have a great technology…but something is amiss. We need to get it more aligned with the lives we want to live.

—Sherry Turkle

I write a lot about conversation as the vehicle for connection with ourselves, each other, and our world. Holidays and vacations can present an opportunity for deeper conversation and authentic connection. Our usual day-to-day patterns are disrupted a bit, presenting openings for something new to emerge. Often, family members or friends we haven’t seen for a while are visiting, bringing with them the welcomed (and sometimes not-so-welcomed) chance for face-to-face talk. Spontaneous. Unscripted. Surprising. What qualities contribute to deeper conversation?

In her book Reclaiming Conversation, Sherry Turkle presents some compelling research on our use of phones and the impacts on in-person conversation and empathy. [Read more…] about Always on, always on you

Is that me talking to myself?

© by Claudia L’Amoreaux

Think about one of the best conversations you’ve had…with yourself.

My best conversations with myself have been intentional—I made the time, chose the space and form, and showed up. But more important, I prepared. I invested a lot of energy in studying and practicing the qualities of creative conversation, beginning with listening.

My last semester in college I did an apprenticeship at a remarkable school. It was a full-day Montessori preschool and an elementary program inspired by the educational philosophies of A. S. Neill and John Holt. This was the early ’70s. The school was founded by parents and had a very active parents community. School decisions were made in a monthly gathering of all the teachers and all the parents called the Committee of the Whole. When you make decisions by consensus, it becomes clear very quickly that listening is a basic conversational skill. [Read more…] about Is that me talking to myself?

Mindful tech—building trust one conversation at a time

© by Claudia L’Amoreaux

What are your models for conversation? I’m rereading Sherry Turkle’s book, Reclaiming Conversation: The Power of Talk in a Digital Age. Sherry Turkle has been studying human-technology interaction for 30+ years. She shares a lot of insights from her work in her newest book.

In this passage from the book she reflects on the Oxford English Dictionary definition of conversation: [Read more…] about Mindful tech—building trust one conversation at a time

Resources

Here are a few resources—audio and books—that may help you in your Mindful Digital Life adventure. First is an interview from 2004 with Michael Toms (1940–2013), co-founder with Justine Willis Toms of New Dimensions Radio. Though we spoke together over 14 years ago, our conversation about conversation is even more relevant today. The books I’ve included are six of the best books I’ve found to support a Mindful Digital Life.

Loving and Learning Conversation, interview with Claudia by Michael Toms

Reclaiming Conversation The Power of Talk in a Digital Age book coverReclaiming Conversation: The Power of Talk in a Digital Age by Sherry Turkle

Sherry Turkle has been studying human-technology interaction for 30+ years. If you read only one book, this is it. Sherry is the Abby Rockefeller Mauzé Professor of the Social Studies of Science and Technology at MIT.

Mindful Tech: How to Bring Balance to Our Digital Lives by David M. Levy

David Levy was an early adopter, working in computer science and AI in Silicon Valley at Xerox PARC where the networked personal computer was invented. He’s on the faculty at the University of Washington’s Information School where he does research and teaches about digital developments. Calligraphy provided his entrance into contemplative practice. This book brings David’s fast world, high-tech experience together with slow world contemplative practice, offering Mindful Tech exercises from his work with students at the I School.

The Triple Focus: A New Approach to Education by Daniel Goleman and Peter Senge

This book is a good follow up book to read after Reclaiming Conversation. You’ll notice parallels between Thoreau’s 3 chairs in Turkle’s book with Goleman and Senge’s three focuses—inner, other, outer. It’s a beautiful and important book.

Peter Senge is an organizational learning and systems thinking visionary at MIT and author of The Fifth Discipline. Daniel Goleman is author of Emotional Intelligence, and a founder of the movement for social and emotional learning.

It's Complicated book coverIt’s Complicated: The Social Lives of Networked Teens by danah boyd

danah boyd is a media scholar and Principal Researcher at Microsoft Research, and Fellow at Harvard University’s Berkman Center for Internet and Society. This book is based on extensive interviews danah did with teens about their use of social media from 2005 to 2012.

danah communicates the nuances of the networked lives of today teens, offering a perspective I have not seen anywhere else.

Media Moms & Digital Dads: A Fact-Not-Fear Approach to Parenting in the Digital Age by Yalda T. Uhls, PhD

Yalda T. Uhls brings her unique background as a media producer, child psychologist, and parent of two “digital” teens to the exploration of digital life in the family. She works with Common Sense Media as their director of creative community partnerships and does research with UCLA. Her research focuses on how older and newer media impact the social behavior of preadolescents.

I appreciate how Yalda combines research with actionable tools for parents helping their kids navigate digital life.

Brainstorm: The Power and Purpose of the Teenage Brain by Daniel J. Siegel MD.

Brainstorm will reframe how you think about the teenage brain. If you have a tween or teen in the house, read the book. Dr. Daniel Siegel is clinical professor of psychiatry at the UCLA School of Medicine and founding co-director of UCLA’s Mindful Awareness Research Center.

Please note: Mindful Digital Life is an Amazon Affiliate Partner and will receive a small share of revenue if you decide to purchase any books using these links. Thank you for your support.